Has this ever happened to you? As you move toward the brink of new change in your life, your mind starts telling you all the reasons you should "just quit already!" Me too. And I hope this blog post gives you some relief and a moment of quiet to choose what really is for your highest good- to keep going, change tracks, pause for a bit, stop, etc.
It can be confusing as you try to sort out what your true feelings are, what is for your highest good, and if your current path is really for your best interest. Change is uncomfortable, can trigger your primal instinct that you are unsafe, and takes a lot of energy and stamina. Also, change includes uncertainty. . . is it really the right choice? Add ego to the mix, and you can get utterly confused and unable to move forward or backward…paralyzed with indecision.
Ego doesn't want us to change. It will try to stop us from doing something different. It will send a storm of thoughts to feed a storm of emotions to get you to just go back to your old ways. It is based on fear. Fear we will embarrass ourselves. Fear we will fail. Fear others will judge us. Fear, fear, fear!
So what do you do? Here you are on the brink of change, and your mind is trying to convince you to stop, your body is reacting like this is a life or death situation, and your heart feels confused, saying:
"If I wanted this, why does it feel so bad when I'm so close to getting it?"
In this moment, I've found what works for me best is to find quiet. Quiet from other people's opinions, quiet from my mind, quiet from the change itself. Taking the time to calm myself down through Tai Chi Qigong, yoga, meditation, taking the dog for a walk, journaling, watching trees dance in the wind, or looking up at the clouds passing by.
The quiet gives my body a chance to calm down, gives me a break from ego's chatter, and gives my heart a chance to truly speak to me. The quiet also gives me a moment to find a gentle humor in my ego yelling at me to "quit!"
“One day you may catch yourself smiling at the voice in your head, as you would smile at the antics of a child. This means that you no longer take the content of your mind all that seriously, as your sense of self does not depend on it.”
― Eckhart Tolle, Practicing the Power of Now: Essential Teachings, Meditations, and Exercises from the Power of Now
Then I use this moment of quiet to recognize that the world is moving along without me. I'm not that special! if I don't achieve this, or if I do achieve this, the world will go on. I recognize in that moment that I'm okay. I'm always okay. As I remember that we are all one and eternal, I also remember that I am limitless, abundant, and free, right here, right now. The fear of change is just an illusion. It is just a human experience I am having. It is just part of the drama, part of the game. It is not real.
And from this place, I can look at what's really behind the feelings of fear. What am I really afraid of? Is this something I want to work through, let go of, or deal with at a later time? Then I can choose. Go forward, take a break, select another path, or go back to the way things were. The choice comes from a higher place, now. For all of us, this comes with the opportunity to learn that no matter what you choose to do:
This moment of choosing is a gift. The lesson of presence was given and received.
You are okay, and will be okay whatever you decide.
So, here's five steps to try out (be sure to adjust to what works best for you!):
1. When ego says, "quit," say, "be quiet." In whatever way works for you- meditation, exercise, going out in nature, yoga, listening to music, etc.
2. When you've calmed down, remember you are having a human experience, and that you are okay and will always be okay.
3. Find the humor in ego trying to get you to quit, and thank it for trying to keep you safe. Let it know you are going to make the decision and if you choose going forward, ego will just have to deal with being uncomfortable.
4. Choose from a higher place. Ask yourself, "Is it still for my highest and greatest good to keep going toward your goal?" Give yourself time to sort out the emotions and thoughts that come to you. Consider asking God, the angels, and/or your guides for clarity.
5. Honor yourself for being willing to do all this work- the inner and outer work that change requires. You rock!
Blessings on our journey!
And if you know of anyone who could benefit from this post, please share it by clicking "share" below!